The Summer We Got Busted … Twice

When I lived in NJ, one summer we had a small gathering of friends over for BBQ and drinks but more like it was a music fest sponsored by bad decisions. We were grilling, swimming in the pool during the day, in and out of the jacuzzi at night. Naturally, there was wine and beer involved, because we were adult parents with stress levels that required fermentation!

My two friends/ neighbors (we’ll call them Katey and Lindsy) were there, well into the evening, after 11 pm - with music blaring and having a good time, as we always did. Katey kept making the radio louder like she was trying to signal passing aircrafts, and right after I would lower it and walk away she would make it louder again. I finally gave up because I knew arguing with a drunk woman after she emptied multiple wine glasses is a losing battle.

I guess giving up was a mistake, because apparently none of what we were doing went over well with a neighbor nearby — because one of them called the police! Granted, we were probably too loud, and the combination of music and our laughter just got to the neighbor, who was probably salty because they weren’t invited.

Regardless, when the police arrived, I think they were more shocked than we were - because when they came into the backyard with their flashlights blazing into our eyes, standing before us were two of what looked like the youngest cops I ever saw, and they just started to laugh! Maybe they were lost on the way to their police academy freshman orientation. One of them even had acne!

I asked what they were laughing at and they literally replied:

“We’re sorry, it’s just that on weekends when we get a noise complaint, it’s typically teenagers partying because their parents aren’t home! We never expected to see old people!”

Old people? We were all around 40-ish! We promised to keep it down, and soon as they left- we went right back to the way things were before they arrived. However, I guess the neighbor that called threw in the towel, because they apparently didn’t call the police back.

Round Two: The Karaoke Incident

Another time and another weekend — Katey, Lindsy and I were doing karaoke in Lindsey’s backyard. Lindsy lived 6 houses down the block from me. It was after 10 pm, and there we were acting like music stars, microphones in hand, as if we were headlining Madison Square Garden on our comeback tour.

We were drinking, singing, and minding our own business, and here come two cops, flashlights blazing in our eyes (again). I’m starting to see a pattern! They weren’t the same cops, but men in blue nonetheless — and bummer- they weren’t built like they were auditioning for a calendar… damn-it.

“Ugh, not again,” I said. Katey looked at me and said, “At least it’s not the kiddie cops!”

I laughed, and one of the cops shined the light right into Katey’s face and said, “Excuse me?” Now one would think Katey would have been more compliant but… alcohol.

So she said to the officer: “It’s just that the last time, we had two kids fresh out of the Academy, in uniforms reprimanding us like we were grounded for missing curfew.”

Apparently, that wasn’t the right thing to say, but Lindsey quickly apologized on Katey’s behalf and said we would tone it down. They gave us a stern warning and said they don’t want to come back, and left. We promptly took the karaoke machine inside and continued our fun — because we may be “old,” but we are not quitters.

Never in my life (especially after everything I did growing up) did I ever expect at the age of 40 something, for police to be dispatched - not once, but twice in one summer on us. But, here we are (or should I say- there we were)!

The Takeaway

If the cops show up twice in one summer and you’re over 40, congratulations — you’re still fun, but now you need a lawyer.

 

The Busted Meteor Reading

Category                                  Score                                                             Notes

Chaos Level                             8.5/10          T wo police visits in a summer / no arrests. Impressive.

Volume Control                          2/10          Katey vs. the radio: a battle she absolutely won.

Neighbor Patience                    1/10          They heard us, then immediately dialed 911.

Police Shock Factor               10/10          Expected teens. Found adults pretending to be teens.

Age Insult Accuracy                  0/10        “Old people?” Absolutely not.

Karaoke Commitment              9/10          Took it inside only after law enforcement intervention.

Likely to Repeat Offense         9/10          If music exists, so does the risk.

Cops’ Professionalism             7/10          Stayed serious… until they saw your faces.

Your Group’s Energy                11/10          Backyard Beyoncé meets suburban rebellion.

Actual Crime Committed        0/10          Just being fun in New Jersey.